Understanding Spiritual Awareness & Personal Transformation
Vital Health Zone is proud to announce Gini Grey, who is our resident spiritual awareness and personal transformation expert and who is available to answer all your questions about spiritual awareness and personal empowerment in all areas of your life.
Gini has a private practice and is available for consultation in a number of ways.
Gini answers all your spiritual awareness and personal transformation questions below:
- How do I deal with negative and aggressive people in the workplace?
- How not to let resentment against men influence the parenting of a son
- The begining of a spiritual quest in life - some advice
Q: How do I deal with negative people who are aggressive in their manner without completely ignoring them, in the office, especially when I have to deal with them on a daily basis. If they are rude to me, I don't know how to handle it other than to be rude back or ignore them, but both of these methods makes me feel upset as it isn't a good situation to have to deal with.
Is there any other way of dealing with this that is better for me?
A: Thank you for your question. It's an important one that many people will benefit by reading.
I've discovered over the years that difficult situations and challenging people cross our path for a purpose - to offer an opportunity for insight and growth. Negative, aggressive, rude people are no exception - they are there to show us where we give our power away, where we lose patience or kindness, and what longs for attention within us.
How do you feel when a person is rude and aggressive with you? Does it trigger fear, sadness or anger? Get in touch with that feeling and ask yourself what help to soothe that feeling. If you feel fear, you might need to touch into the feeling of empowerment within you. If you feel small and sad it might help to remind yourself how big and grown-up you are. If you feel angry, perhaps you need to respect yourself on a deeper level so you are not triggered when someone else disrespects you.
When we are so filled with our own self-love, self-appreciation and self-esteem, we are not triggered so easily by the way others treat us. As you give these things to yourself you might be amused the next time a person acts rudely to you. Sometimes people are being rude to get a reaction out of us or to make us feel small. If we refuse to be offended or feel small, they stop being rude as it doesn't give them what they want any more.
Another suggestion is to look past this person's rude behavior to the woundedness underneath. What might have happened to them as a child that led to their current mood and behaviour. If they are rude all the time, they are most likely not very happy. As you look at them from this perspective you will feel compassion for them and not be triggered by them.
The next step is to look past the woundedness of this person to the spark of divine light within them. Each of us is a spiritual being so try to see who they are on that level. This might help you to have a heart-to-heart connection with them, which will heal and soften both of you.
Gini Grey's writings include the book: “From Chaos to Calm” (which can be purchased from the link on the left)
Q: I am very much struggling with how to raise my son. I went through a painful divorce 5 years ago and I harbor a lot of resentment toward men in general for what I perceive is a daily obsession with sex.
How do I raise my son to see that sex can be wonderful between 2 people that love each other, but not to be obsessed with it? How do you raise kids to have a healthy attitude toward the body and sex?
This question might be too provocative for your website, but I felt inspired to ask. Thanks for your time!
A: That is a wonderful question to ask (and not too racy for this site) as sex is a taboo topic, yet it needs to be discussed to heal the imbalance around it.
The first thing that comes to me from a transformational perspective is how important it is for you to heal the pain from your divorce and to release your resentment towards men for being obsessed with sex. As your viewpoint becomes more neutral and you see the possibility of men being balanced with sex, this will have an effect on your son - he will then see the possibility too.
You are a key role model for him so if you would like him to have a healthy, balanced view of male sexuality, you need to find ways to understand, have compassion for, and forgive men who are confused and act out in this area. It would also be helpful to notice all the men who are healthy and balanced around sex. Our beliefs affect what we see and do, so you may have been conditioned to believe men are obsessed with sex and therefore attract these type of men into your view and life experiences. It's not to say that there are not a lot of males who are obsessed with sex, because there are. But there are also men who have worked through these issues or who don't have them to begin with. Be open to seeing all of reality around this issue as this will be very healing for you.
Children are like sponges, absorbing what they see, hear and pick up intuitively from their parents, family, peers, society and the cultural norms they are raised in. The more they hear, see and pick up messages that the body is a natural wonder and not to be ashamed of but is to be taken care of and appreciated (through healthy eating, exercise, rest, self-love etc.) and that sex is a natural expression of love between two people, the more they will take on this perspective. As you live this example and spend time with others who do as well, this will have an effect on your son.
From a spiritual awareness perspective, like the saying goes - we are all spiritual beings having a human experience. We are growing in consciousness as humans but still have a ways to go. Sex is very body oriented and until people become aware of their spiritual side, they tend to let the mind and body dominate (which leads to cravings, addictions etc.). Your son has his own spiritual and human lessons to learn. I believe he chose you and his father as his parents as part of his 'human' experience here on this planet. So another aspect in addition to doing what you can to become more neutral about males and sex so your son can model this, is to trust your son's spiritual and personal growth process. He's a big spiritual being who knows what he's doing on higher levels.
We each have lessons to learn, and sometimes we learn them the hard way as painful experiences have a tendency to push us to surrender, look deeper within and therefore grow personally and spiritually. But as we become more conscious we can learn and heal without painful experiences. May your pain from your divorce and resentments about males dissolve through the love in your heart.
Take care of yourself.
Q: I feel that I am at the beginning of a spiritual quest in my life. I am reading lots of books but I am afraid to join any kind of spiritual groups.
Do you any advice to help me on my journey?
A: Congratulations for entering a spiritual quest in your life - it's an amazing journey to be on a conscious spiritual path. I can understand your concern about joining a spiritual group as the group energy can vary from group to group. Some have a setting which supports individual spiritual growth and autonomy while others may have leaders that take on a guru stance and people sometimes give their power away to the leader or the group.
You mentioned you have done lots of reading, I'm wondering about how much meditation, prayer or inward reflection you have done. I've found that by taking time to meditate I become more aware of myself as a spiritual being and my intuitive senses come alive more. This then supports me to know what my next step is regarding taking a workshop or joining a group or just doing my own inward connecting to the God of my heart.
Perhaps taking some experiential workshops that are focused on spiritual pursuits such as meditating or other personal or spiritual practices you are drawn to might be a helpful next step. I would encourage you to take some quiet time, separate from others information, where you can check in with yourself on a deeper level to see what you are drawn to on a heart and soul level.
Another thing to do is to set an intention to be led to what is your next best step. Connect to your higher power or the God of your heart or Source or Nature or the Universe (many names for the essence of all life - which are you drawn to?) and ask for guidance or a sign. I'm sure you will soon be led to what is appropriate for you. You will know if a particular spiritual group is a fit for you as you will feel drawn to it.
Trust yourself to know what is appropriate for you. If you end up in a group that doesn't feel right to you, you can always leave. Sometimes it's part of our journey to go somewhere that isn't best for us as it helps us to hone our intuitive skills to know what is good for us in the future. It's all just experiences which offer growth and learning. With conscious awareness we become better at discerning what we really want.
Remember, you are a powerful spiritual being creating your life, one step at a time, and with conscious intention, you can create what is in perfect alignment for you.
Enjoy the journey.
Enjoy better health!
