Improving communication with your partner can significantly strengthen your relationship.
Improving communication takes effort from both partners, but these strategies can help create a more open, understanding, and supportive relationship.
Here are some strategies to foster better communication.
Active listening
Active listening is a communication technique where the listener fully engages with the speaker, focusing on understanding their message without interruption or distraction. It involves not only hearing the words but also paying attention to nonverbal cues such as tone of voice and body language.
Focus fully on your partner when they’re speaking. Avoid interrupting, and show that you’re listening through nodding or verbal acknowledgements.
Reflect back what you’ve heard to ensure understanding and to show that you’re engaged. This helps to validate their feelings, fostering a deeper connection and effective communication.
Use “I” statements
Frame your feelings and thoughts from your own perspective to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say “I feel upset when…” instead of “You always make me upset when…” This approach reduces defensiveness and promotes a more constructive conversation.
Show you are engaged through nodding, maintaining eye contact, and providing verbal affirmations like “I see” or “I understand.”
Be clear and specific
To be clear and specific with your partner, focus on articulating your thoughts and needs with precision, clarity and directness.
Avoid vague statements by detailing exactly what you’re feeling and what you need from them, using concrete examples when possible. For instance, instead of saying, “I need more help around the house,” specify, “I would appreciate it if you could help with the dishes and take out the trash twice a week.”
Clear communication helps prevent misunderstandings and ensures that both partners are on the same page, leading to more effective and constructive interactions.
Practice empathy
Try to understand things from your partner’s perspective. Acknowledge their feelings and experiences, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them. This shows respect and helps build a stronger emotional connection.
Practising empathy with your partner involves actively trying to understand their emotions and perspectives, even if you don’t share their exact feelings or experiences. Start by listening attentively and without judgement, acknowledging their feelings and validating their emotions. Use reflective statements, like “It sounds like you’re feeling…” to show you’re engaged and understand their viewpoint. Express compassion and support by affirming their experiences, and offer reassurance that their feelings are important to you. By approaching conversations with an open heart and a genuine desire to connect, you create a more supportive and understanding relationship.
Set aside quality time
To set aside quality time with your partner, establish a regular routine where you dedicate uninterrupted time to each other, free from distractions like phones or work. Regularly dedicate time to have meaningful conversations without distractions. This helps ensure that both partners feel heard and valued. Make it a point to check in with each other about how things are going, beyond just discussing problems.
Plan activities you both enjoy, such as cooking a meal together, taking a walk, or having a weekly date night. Prioritise this time by treating it as an important appointment, and communicate your commitment to it with your partner.
By consistently carving out and valuing this shared time, you strengthen your bond, improve communication and create lasting memories.
Last reviewed and updated: 15 July 2024
